Day 9 – Oh Yeah, Forgot About That!

Today was a very important day for Ripley and it involved our first trip out with him to Dover…

Registering a Birth

So here’s one of those things you can easily forget about!  And if you do forget and take more than 42 days to register you will be charged.  As it stands if you do it early enough all you pay for is copies of the birth certificate.  Until you register them, they’re not official and probably won’t appreciate it when it comes time for them to go to school, get a job or go on their gap year!

You can register them at most major council offices but generally (certainly here in Kent) have to register an appointment to go and do so.

It’s a pretty boring and straightforward process where you get asked a few questions about the baby and the parents before signing the birth certificate (only one of you needs to be there) and then deciding how many copies you want.

Tip of the day – You need the birth certificate for things like child benefit applications and getting their passports, most of which is done via mail.  Just in case it gets lost in the mail I would recommend getting 2 or 3 copies as they cost just a few pounds (£4 for us I think) there and then, but if you need copies at a later date they do cost more!

It took a little longer than expected and Ripley, true to his name let a fart rip during the interview so we popped down to the toilet to change him.  Isn’t it sad that in the library in the disabled toilet they have to have that horrible anti junkie lighting which is the weird blue colour so you can’t see your veins!

There wasn’t any poop but of course this woke him up and we had to then pop down to Costa to feed him…  and have a little caffeine pick me up for us too of course…  Although I like my caffeine fizzy and got a coke!

Nappy Shortage

We’re supposed to go to my mum’s house at this point but now I know why people with babies are so damn unreliable.  We left Dover at the time we should have been at my mum’s but still had to make a quick pit stop at Tesco for nappies.  You won’t believe how hard it is to get size 0 nappies!

We’ve tried all sorts and settled on preferring the Pampers ones, but all they had in Tesco were the Pampers Premiums…  Thankfully they were on offer, other wise I’d be paying £10 for every 24 shits or pisses he does!  Having buy one get one free made me feel slightly less bitter about it…  And they’re pretty good nappies to be fair!

With a lot of the cheaper nappies he seems to somehow manage to piss, keep everything at the front dry and then have it leak up and around his bum crack to pour out of the top of his nappy soaking his clothes and what ever or who ever he is laying on.


Poop Everywhere

His groin had been getting a little red from being in a nappy 24/7 so we decided to give him some no nappy time…  BUT – I’m no idiot so I wrapped him up in a blanket.

Just in case!

Thank god that I did!  Not more than 5 minutes had passed when I felt this massive pressure against my hand, as if someone had punched their way out of his arse…  and then the smell hit!  So I ran upstairs to the changing table and assessed the damage.

I was so glad that I didn’t have him sitting on my chest skin on skin otherwise I would have been covered, and where he has spent more time on the bottle, his crap has really changed now.  If you’d seen this I can only say that you wouldn’t be ordering a chicken korma for a few weeks afterwards!

And as soon as you think that…  as soon as your brain goes “look mate, that looks like a fuckin’ korma”, there’s no going back from that.  You know what I see now every time I see a korma…  Shit!

But after all this. we managed to get something really important checked off our to do list, and with an empty stomach he slept like a rock that night!

Oh and his umbilical chord is looking more and more like biltong (and no matter how often I think that, not much will put me off eating jerky and biltong) every day so I think it’s gonna come off pretty soon.

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